Ups and Downs

A few significant things have happened in our lives in the past couple of months.  And if I could choose a theme to tie together all of these events, it would be:  Family is EVERYTHING.  We talked a lot about the Proclamation on the family today at church, and it just furthered the gratitude I have for my family, and for my husband's family, and for those challenging, beautiful kids we get to call our own.

"So what's been going on?" you may ask.  Let's start at the beginning.  At the beginning of May, I called the Oregon Health & Science University, where Noel was on a waiting list for a comprehensive evaluation in their Autism Clinic.  I'd been told that, once I was able to be scheduled, it would still be a few more months -- probably July or August.  So I was surprised and grateful to hear that I would be able to take him in on May 31st.  Which is exactly what I did.  To say that my hopes were up for this appointment would be a laughable understatement.  We'd taken him to a Developmental Pediatrician, who hadn't impressed us, and we were so ready to get a diagnosis.  To make a long story short, he was evaluated for 5 hours by an occupational therapist, child psychologist, speech-language pathologist, and a developmental pediatrician.   And. . .we're kind of at the same place as we were when we started.  He's been officially diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and ADHD, with further therapy needed to determine if he is on the autism spectrum and/or has a language disorder.  His tests indicated that he was on the autism spectrum, but because he is so young and does not fit neatly into any category, they are hesitant to give him that diagnosis until they have more information.  One crucial thing that came from this evaluation was the speech-language pathologist's observation that Noel has a possible language disorder.  We'd never considered this, but thinking about it, it makes so much sense.  He has a very difficult time communicating, and oftentimes words don't seem to make sense to him.  Lately, he's developed a charming habit of saying, "WHAT?!?!?" really loud whenever he's not understanding you, which could be 12 times a minute.  So, we now need to figure out if there is a language disorder, and if it and the ADHD and anxiety are symptoms of Asperger's.  But really we're in a holding pattern, because. . .

When I arrived home from the appointment (which, incidentally, we'd been told would cost two to three thousand dollars and most likely would not be covered by insurance), Josh told me that he had been laid off. It's hard for me to see it as bad timing, though, since the fact that we were able to get an appointment before we lost our insurance was nothing short of a miracle.  And also because our insurance did in fact cover the appointment and ended up costing us less than $200. So yes, he lost his job, but I know, with a level of surety second only to what I felt on my wedding day, that Heavenly Father knew me and loved me and was going to take care of us.

Noel, on the way home from his appointment.

Which brings me to my family.  I have amazing parents.  I've always been grateful to them for the way that they raised me and the opportunities they provided me and, most importantly, the example that they are of a husband and wife who love each other and love their kids more than any other thing in the world.  So, when I talked to my mom that evening after one of the most intense days of my life, I broke down and sobbed, "How are we going to take care of our babies?" and my mom said, without a moment of hesitation, "I'll take care of the babies.  And I'll take care of you."  And I'll never, ever forget that.  I believe that, no matter how old you get or how many kids of your own that you have, you always need your mom.  Only my mom could say those words and bring me peace.  And I haven't sobbed since.

Whenever Josh brings up being unemployed, usually as a punchline to one of his jokes, and it brings an uncomfortable silence or a look of pity, I say, "Don't feel bad for us!  I haven't seen Josh this happy in a long time!"  Which is true.  He'd been truly, devastatingly unhappy for the better part of a year.  It was literally an answer to prayers.  Next time you ask God to help you be happy in your current employment or help you find a different path, don't think, as Josh did, that Apple is going to call and offer you your dream job.  And while it might involve a period of sacrifice and struggle, I really believe it's for the best.  I now remember what Josh was like before he became crippled by work pressure -- and that amount of unhappiness is no way to live a life.

So now we're on the job hunt.  And by we, I mean me.  Josh does the actual hard work, like the interviews and having the actual marketable skills and talents that will land a job, but my A-type personality has certainly come in handy when it comes to finding job openings.  I know that, in a few months, after this has all become much less quaint, the mood will probably take a bit of a downturn, but for now, I'm just grateful to have a husband who's a true partner.  And it helps that I love him and believe in him and find him great company, since we're certainly seeing a lot of each other these days.

So this is a little tribute to our families.  Our kids.  Each other.  Because all that other stuff really, truly doesn't matter.  

The boys in all their nerdy glory.

The prettiest cousins in the world.  P.S.  Is Merril sleeping?

Only Grandpa could explain the parts of this boat for an hour straight.

Grandpa gives the best raft rides (you know, if you're a boy who's terrified of boats).

On a boat ride with Uncle Rick.  He narrowly escaped with his life.  It's hard to stay in the boat when, instead of hanging on, you've got your hands over your ears.

On a ride with Cousin Jessica.  Lila only lasted about 30 seconds.  Noel loved it.  That child is an enigma.

Our classy and adorable group.

Jungle Jim's with BFF (and cousin) Bella.

4th of July Fireworks!

Noel makes it work.

Lila has inherited my paralyzing fear of fireworks.

4th of July Family Fun

Author's Note: This was actually written by Amy.